Defeat the monsters under my skin.

It happened.

I got engaged. My love who I explained in my last post – asked me to marry him. It’s crazy! It’s crazy that a few years ago – I didn’t even know who he was and now I can’t even remember what it was like without him by my side.

My best friend, my other half.. my human diary. The man that makes me feel safe when it feels like my world has been turned upside down not only from those people and things around me. He makes me feel safe from myself and the words I dig in my head about myself.

The other night I didn’t want to talk because it was just – a down day. I felt like I was useless. I felt like I didn’t have anything of importance or useful to add to a conversation so I just shut down. I thought it was stupid but I started crying. He stopped his truck. He came around, opened the door to the passenger seat and just looked at me. Stared into my eyes telling me that no matter what – my issues aren’t stupid.

“Even just talking about the weather is useful. Your issues aren’t stupid. It’s not stupid, especially if it’s affecting you.”

Telling me that he is here to make me happy and he wouldn’t have asked for my hand in marriage if it were any other way. He hugged me and kissed my forehead. He didn’t let go until I was laughing.

It’s crazy to think that a few years ago – I was battling everything by myself. Trying to defeat the monsters under my skin without a word to anybody. Now – I have somebody to lean on and he’s able to lean onto me. I can’t say it enough; I’m so lucky to have this man. He’s so intelligent, gentle, kind and incredible funny. I can’t wait to marry him.

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